1. Kathy Griffin started 2013 off right by offering to gingerly tickle Anderson Cooper’s balls.
The silver fox’s sack isn’t safe from prying redhead hands.
2. Lady-boner-bait Ed Sheeran was nominated for a Grammy AND toured with Taylor Swift.
Beat that, 1D.
3. We converted Claire Danes to the ginger side, which made this beautiful photo possible.
4. Actually, we converted a lot of people this year.
Including Rumer Willis, Irina Shayk, Michelle Trachtenberg, Dianna Agron, Demi Lovato, and Rachel McAdams.
7. Jessica Chastain graced the cover of Vogue and looked like a flawless goddess.
9. And to get to the redhead festival, one pilot offered a redheads-only flight.
No non-gingers need apply, kthxbi.
10. Ewan McGregor returned to our lives, like a Scottish alien of hotness, in the film August: Osage County.
Please, don’t leave us again, Ewan. My heart can’t handle it!
11. LiLo embraced her natural color this year, thereby allowing us all to breathe again.
Welcome back, LiLo. Just don’t ever betray us again. xoxo
12. Domhnall Gleeson was a redhead leading male love interest in About Time. Because he’s super adorable and swoon worthy.
I’m also fairly certain that this is the first time a ginger has been a leading love interest in a film? Unless you count Robert Redford’s strawberry mane, of course.
13. Cate Blanchett admitted that going red was the best decision she ever made. Duh.
“I also bleached my eyelashes and eyebrows,” she told Allure of her red hair in Elizabeth: The Golden Age. “I quite liked it, really, that pale-redhead look.”
14. Faux redhead (but we accept you, girrr!) Ellie Kemper was cast in Tina Fey’s new TV project.
Get ready for so much ginger loving, y’all.
15. Our Queen’s spawn, Liv, proved herself to be the most adorable little ginger lady ever.
Liv is a Julianne clone, and therefore we love her unconditionally.
16. Oh, and did I mention that our Queen also has a ginger son named Cal? God is good.
LONG LIVE THE QUEEN.
17. Photographer Thomas Knights did the world a favor this year by reminding us of how beautiful redhead men are.
18. Amy Poehler’s ginger son, Abel, turned 3, and continued to dominate the cute redhead kid market.
You are a lucky lady, Amy, and thank you for this gift to the world.
19. Kate Mara was all kinds of sexy/terrifying in House of Cards, further proving that no one should mess with us. Ever.
20. Christina Hendricks continued to rock the redhead cause simply by breathing and standing.
Bless you, bb. (You’re a faux redhead, but we ACCEPT YOU.)
21. Louis C.K. won a TCA Award and also graced us with his amazing presence in Blue Jasmine.
Funny redheads, UNITE!
22. Merida and Brave nabbed an Oscar for Best Animated Feature Film of the Year.
23. Joss Whedon lent his ginger hand to Much Ado About Nothing and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D..
24. Michael Fassbender starred in a third Steve McQueen film, 12 Years a Slave, and the oscar rumors are already swirling.
If that’s not enough, Fassbender once said this about being a redhead in an interview: “I’m a ginger, and there’s not much more fun you can get as a ginger. And I think that’s why there’s a lot of resentment toward the ginger community. We’re vikings, essentially.”
25. Conan O’Brien’s late-night show was renewed through 2015. All hail King Coco!
26. The first ever Ginger Pride walk took place in 2013.
We’re loud, we’re proud, get used to these gingers!
27. Ginger Prince Cumberbatch starred in five films this year.
Time to recognize the power of the ginge tinge, Cumberbitches.
28. Redhead convert Emma Stone said this wonderful thing about our people:
Read it in full here.
29. A kid dressed as Harry Potter and went to Penn Station, and this tall redhead did the right thing and said he was Ron Weasley.
See the whole thing here.
30. And a real redhead prince used 2013 as a time to volunteer for the Walking with the Wounded South Pole Allied Challenge 2013 British team.
Prince Harry will trek over 200 miles across Antartica to raise money for wounded vets. So, yes, we have the better prince. (Sorry, Wills.)
31. Being Ginger, a documentary film about being a redhead male and trying to find love, debuted.
Any film about navigating love as a redhead is OK by us.
32. Male model Lasse Pedersen rocked the catwalk and ads for Bottega Venetta this year.
More redheads in fashion, please.
33. And did I mention that Brazilian model Cintia Dicker was in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue for the fifth consecutive year?
34. Researchers created a DNA map of redhair gene carriers in the UK, proving that 20 million citizens carry the gene.
We’re not going extinct, we’re just waiting for the right time to takeover the world, is all. Maybe in 2014?!